The Rules of Dating

So I’ve mentioned how dating has changed since the last time I was out there. I thought it would be a nice idea to line up some of the Hollywood expectations of dating next to the “rules” real life dating.

Let’s start with the most obvious one. Nobody plays coy anymore. If you’re interested in someone, you gotta let them know. Enough with waiting for the guy to make the first move. As for both parties: there’s nothing wrong with getting in touch without waiting 72 hours or whatever else somebody once decided was a good idea. Honestly, in three days, I’ll probably forget who you were anyway. And while we’re on the subject: people text now. If that’s not something you’re cool with, you gotta let them know. Mindreading is not a thing.

The trickiest of the dating rules is the one about who pays for what. If you’ve read my blog before, you know where I stand on a woman controlling her finances. Of course it’s still a personal choice, but here’s where I stand on it: whoever does the asking should be prepared to pay. Does this mean you’ll end up footing the whole bill? Possibly. But it’s a risk you have to be willing to take. Also, it’s a nice little incentive to stay within your means. If you’re the invitee, do the right thing and at least make an attempt at paying. If the other person doesn’t want you to, cool. At least you showed you were willing to, which is usually just as good as paying.
If it goes well, and you decide to, for example, go for drinks after a movie, this could be a cue for the other person to pay. Again, this is all about being clear on where you stand. But honestly, getting offended because a guy suggests y’all go Dutch? It’s 2016, shape up.

Finally, please, for the love of Nutella, be clear in what you want from someone. If you’re looking for a relationship, be honest about it. If you’re looking for a good time, no strings attached, that’s cool too, but make sure everybody involved knows! It’s that easy to not be a douche.