The urge to instant gratification has always been around. However, it seems to be getting more and more prominent. Probably because everything you want is at your fingertips, a few screen taps away. So is that a good or a bad thing?
Think about it. When’s the last time you raced home with the excitement of having your favorite artist’s new album in your bag, not being able to wait until you can listen to it for the first time? Now you open up your Spotify or Tidal or whatever app on your phone and click on it. Same with food. You can have any- and everything delivered to your door, whether you prefer takeout or cooking it yourself. So of course the dating world didn’t stay far behind. Actually I’m pretty sure it lead the pack.
So you got your dating apps. Or hookup apps, because let’s call it what it is. The entire premise is based on instant gratification. Not judging, just as I always tell you guys: do what you gotta do as long as no one gets hurt. I tried the whole app thing. Didn’t work for me. I had it for a couple of days, but the whole idea of judging somebody based on a profile picture and some random corny lines in a bio seemed too alien to me. I got a few notifications, didn’t know how to respond, and deleted the app. That solved it.
On the other end of the spectrum you have delayed gratification. I have a friend who deploys a 90-day rule whenever meeting someone new. Their argument? It’s supposed to help you get to know the person on a personal level first, and also make sure the entire relationship isn’t based on sex. There’s some truth to that, if that works for you of course.
At the end of the day I really don’t think there’s much wrong with instant gratification if you think you can deal with the consequences. For myself, I’ll probably remain my impatient self when it comes to situations that really won’t matter in 10 years, like if I want to get another pair of shoes without waiting for the sale (haha, kidding, I refuse to pay full price) or ordering an extra large plate of nachos. But when it comes to matters of the heart, or even way before that when still in the dating phase, I tread a bit more carefully. And that’s what works best for me.