The Ultimate Guide to Getting Over Your Ex

The end of cuffing season is creeping up on us, and you know what that means. Breakups. Lots and lots of ’em. Seems like a good moment to break out the 3-step program to getting over an ex.

So this is more or less the program I stuck to when I broke up with my ex a year ago (almost to the day). To commemorate the occasion, let me share my way for getting over him and the entire relationship. Works for both the dumper and the dumpee.

The very first thing you’ll wanna do is give yourself some time to be sad. That’s OK, just don’t let it last too long. I’m not going to go into the whole sad playlist, ice cream, focus on work speech. You can be sad for a couple of days, and then it’s time to take action.

Step 1: Get OUT

Get. Out. Call your besties and go out. Or better yet: travel (if your budget allows it). There’s no better way to forget about your stupid sadness and stupid ex than by focusing all that energy on the ones who have stood by you and are ready to help you back up on your feet and go back to being your fabulous self.

I firmly believe that showing yourself a little extra care can go a long way into actually feeling better. Get up, dress up and show up.

Step 2: Cut Off

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. Unless y’all share a kid, there is no reason for y’all to be friends. Like, none. You want new friends? See step 1.

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Here’s what you do. Unfriend. Unfollow. Block if you need to. Change the phone number under his name into your best friend’s phone number if you need to. That way you can’t drunk text/call him and will call your understanding, tough-loving bestie instead.

Step 3: Fly Solo

Some people are better at this than others. I promised myself this the day after the breakup: I would remain single for at least a year. I needed to redefine myself outside of a relationship and learn to rely on myself (which was a lot easier than I thought it would be — benefits of an unbalanced relationship). Take this time to focus on you, pick up hobbies you neglected or explore new ones. Meet new people. Date for the hell of it. And the always cliché, yet accurate: fall in love with yourself.

That’s all I got, it worked wonders for me. In part thanks to the support system I had around me (shoutout to Lola!). Good luck.