Relationships with an Expiration Date: what now?

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If we were to believe Hollywood tropes, we’ll all meet somebody sooner or later who makes us wonder how we ever lived life without them and we’ll ride off into the sunset together and live happily ever after. But what happens when you meet somebody, fall for them, and then come to the realization that your relationship has an expiration date?

An expiration date could be caused by many things. Maybe one of you is planning to take a job abroad. Maybe their family will never accept you and they choose their family over you. Maybe you’ve set a deadline for yourself about by what age you want kids. Or any other reason, really. Some relationships just aren’t built to last.

You might not know right away. You might intentionally ignore that little voice in the back of your head yelling “Uhm buddy, can we not do this? You’re not in it for shits and giggles!”
And here’s the thing. Just because you know it’ll end, doesn’t mean it has to be any less real. So how do you make the most of it knowing that this relationship will end soon?

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Enjoy the Moment

Probably the most important and most obvious one. And also the hardest (if you’re like me). Enjoy the time you have together and max out on fun stuff to do together. I’m kinda future-oriented, so this one’s very difficult for me. I’m always thinking about the next step, which is kind of a tricky one in a relationship with an expiration date. Which leads me to the next point…

Protect Yourself

What I mean by this one is that you need to make sure that if you don’t want to be part of conversations about your partner’s ~future~ (that you’re not in), don’t be. It’s OK to sometimes let your imagination run, but make sure you keep your feet planted in reality.

Prepare

You can prepare yourself for the impending breakup in a number of ways. Firstly, make sure that you keep the rest of your life active. Plan in plenty of time with family and friends. You don’t wanna wake up one day partner-less and find out that you’ve alienated everyone else in your life. Another thing is to have “the talk”, which is different in the case of an expiration date. You’re gonna wanna discuss if you want to stay in each other’s lives and if so, in what capacity. I have to stress here though: if you end up too deep in your feelings, this one’s a slippery slope. However, regardless of how you feel, you can’t resent your partner for the breakup. You both knew what you were getting into. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best is always the best policy here.

What if I can’t do these things?

Honestly? Just end it now. Don’t do this to yourself if you can’t handle it. I learned the hard way and it ain’t pretty.

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